COVER: Chinese jet fighter shoots down Santa Claus, crying “Eat death, bloated lackey of the capitalist toy mongers!”

Contents (listing only)

Editorial

Letters, From the Editors

News of the Month, Uncredited [Henry Beard]

Horrorscope, Uncredited [Doug Kenney]

Mrs. Agnew’s Diary, Uncredited [Doug Kenney]

Contest

Christmas Beware!, By Gahan Wilson

Christmas Gifts for Liberals, By Terry Catchpole

Capitol Hull Comix, By Joe Orlando

Write Your Own Agnew Speech, By Nicholas Fish [Henry Beard]

Fishmouth, By Ray Puechner

Joey and Jill in Santaland, By Arnold Roth

The Myth of the Mafia, By Christopher Rush

Stocking Stuffers

Underachievers Jokes, By Fran Kafka [Doug Kenney]

Things of Past Remembrance, By Peter Schickele

Santology, By Henry Beard

I Remember Jesus, By John Boni

6 Surefire Costumes Guaranteed to Get You on “Let’s Make a Deal”, By Michael O’Donoghue and Rick Meyerowitz

Peace Comes to the Middle East, By By Golda Meir and Isidore Silver

Sob Story, By Bob Goldman

Make Mine Mulch, By Elio Bosco