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ContentsLetter From the Editor, By Sean Kelly Fifteen suggestions for achieving a bummer buzz Letters, Uncredited; Illustration by Marvin Mattleson Hot Flashes, Text and photos uncredited; Illustration by Marvin Mattleson Press photos (some doctored) with humorous captions Mrs. Agnew's Diary, Uncredited (Doug Kenney); Illustration by Marvin Mattleson The Agnews and the Nixons attend a rocket launch escorted by Dr. Werner von Braun News of the Month, Uncredited (Henry Beard); Illustration by Marvin Mattleson German companies try to exploit the "nostalgia" craze in advertisements; A mysterious chemical slick of the coast of California; Grisley mass-murder of 346,782 Vietnanmese under investigation; Advantages of the Soviet justice system; Flowing lava and Mafiosi compared, accompanied by study questions Defeat Comics, By Michael O'Donoghue and George W. S. Trow; Illustrated by Crag W. Granite War comc book parody in which four brothers join up hoping to become heroes in Vietnam only to end up as drug addicts, traitors and black marketeers. Includes ad for Lt. Calley's Kill the Children Federation and Madame Ky's Puzzle Page which contains puzzles such as "How many dead Vietcong can you find in this picture?" Welfare Monopoly, By John Weidman Parody of the Monopoly board game in which one player is a slum lord and the rest of the players are renters on Welfare As the Monk Burns, By John Boni TV soap opera set amidst murder and mayhem in a war ravaged village in Vietnam Canada Supplement, By Sean Kelly, Anne Beatts, and Michel Choquette; Illustrations by Chas B Slackman, Joe Orlando, L. Ross, and Al Rossi A potpourri of short articles about Canada, "The Retarded Giant on Your Doorstep" including: Americans, Know Your Canada, interesting facts and a guide to language; Canadian History at a Glance, including a Cwick Canada Cwiz (actually Canada jokes); Northern Lights, some famous Canadians (better known for their success in the U.S.); Canada, As Modern As Today, photos from the '40s supposedly showing how "up-to-date" Canada is; Canada's "Rye" Sense of Humour, Acollection of Canadianized non-jokes; Canada, Daybed of Democracy, Canada's role as a source of armaments for the U.S.; Shinney: The Real Hockey Tourists Never See, A short story by a world traveler who passes himself off as a Québeçois to discover the real Canada; The Quest for a Canadian Identity, Results of an opion pole; How to tell if you're Canadian; Honourary Canucks; Toronto, Someplace Like Home, A photo essay on the "exciting" lifestyle enjoyed by Torontans; An RCMP Poster depicting a pig on horseback; and The Frog Prince: A Canadian Fairy Tale, a comic featuing Pierre Trudeau Foto Funnies, Uncredited A middle-aged man tries some acid (Classified), By Tony Hendra A newsletter for those in the surveilance business featuring news of the annual convention (unannounced and unattended, for security reasons), letters not to the editor, an invitation not to subscribe with a blank to fill in to reveal who told you about (Classified), Faces Not in the News, ads, etc. A Cavalcade of Bummers, Cartoons by Arnold Roth The Machining of America, By Anne Beatts; Illustration by Michael Gross Parody of "The Greening of America" outlining a utopian vision of an industrial future Computer Fight of the Century, By Rick Meyerowitz Lt. William "Machine Gun" Calley vs. Charles "Charlie" Manson in a simulated boxing match, with Howard Cosell announcing The Nadar Report on Consumers, By Peter Ivers; Illustration by Peter Schaumann An exposé of a group with inordinate power over the American economy: consumers Right On!, By Terry Catchpole; Illustration by Gray Morrow Merchandising kit for a movie starring Jane Fonda as a radical activist, with tips on exploiting the counterculture to ensure big box-office returns Would You Buy a Used War from This Man?, By John Boni and Henry Beard Photos from Nixon's press conference announcing the invasion of Cambodia captioned as a television commercial promising relief from the heartbreak of Indochina through Peaceplan, with Honor®
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